All I Want For Christmas Is YOU! (and you, and you)

That's a lie. Working on my xmas list now. :)

Twilight

Today, my 4 o clock class was canceled because of Thanksgiving. (Is it normal that spellcheck says there's only one L? I thought there were 2...let me know, someone. It might be American spelling or it might be Amanda Can't Spell.) Anyhoo, Emily and I were at the UV, famous for their $6 movie tickets, and noted that Twilight was playing at 4:15. Uh, hells yea. Then I texted Rona, and she decided that it was worth skipping class for.

You know what that means...

Overall, I did like the movie. Quite a lot. I thought it was a good adaptation with a great cast, but some of the editing was a little awkward, they could have used a leeetle less exposition and also I wish they would have put a couple more million into the special effects, because while it looks good for the most part, there's a couple of really awk looking 'flying through the air' moments that ruin the movie.

Question of the day: How are there so many non-white people in this tiny ass town in WA? Like, props to the movie for having such a diverse cast, but you KNOW that aint real life.

First off, cast. Because that is obvs the most important.

Kristen Stewart was amazing. Or I thought so, I've read that she was boring but um, read the books, Bella is dull as balls. She got a bit into it sometimes, but she was cool and her hair was very pretty. Her make up might have been a little distracting at times.

Robert Pattinson was hot, duh. His voice and looks were kind of channelling Hayden Christensen in Star Wars at some points, but only in the best of ways as opposed to the angsty teen ways. He was really great when he or someone else said something awkward, then there would be a pause and then he would just get this wtf kind of look.

Others: I LOVED Jessica. In the book, she was annoying as eff. In the movie she was HILARIOUS. Mike was cuter than I thought he'd be. Eric was Asian, and basically had the same character as all the cool funky Asian guys of the last couple of years - 21, Disturbia, Nick n Nora.. Nikki Reed was pretty great, and looked better as a blonde than I expected. Jasper was funny. Alice was pretty, I really liked Victoria... I mean they were all great. Charlie was awesome too, way more of a DILF than you'd have expected. Jacob had bad times hair. So did Cam, he's much hotter in magazines. Carlisle's voice was a little over-actingy at the end.

Best scene: Oooh, it's a toss up for me between the baseball scene, the scene where Edward first drives Bella to school and looks really hot and puts his arm around her, or when he appears in her room and they make out. For the making out, duh.

(um, I stole all my pics, and this one has a watermark... please don't kill me, whoever owns this!)

Best-worst scene: When Edward first smells Bella in the science lab... FUNNIEST FACE. I didn't think he was meant to be that obvious, and he def didn't look like he wanted to eat her. He looked like he wanted to throw up.

Worst scene: When Bella figures out that he's a vampire and says she's not scared, and to make her scared he insists on making her see him sparkle? That makes no sense. Taking off your shirt is not going to make a girl scared, only mildly disappointed that there are no abs.

Best parts: Apart from the cast .. and my list of best scenes... the cinematography was beautiful, everything had a really nice look to it. The soundtrack was pretty amazing, except where the eff was Decode? Some of the dialogue was really hilarious. Rob's wardrobe was sharp, and by sharp I mean hot. Oh actually you know what, when Cam beats Bella up, that was pretty good. Look out for Stephenie Meyer's cameo, it was god-awful and oh so great.

Worst parts: Like I said, a couple of the special effects shots really ruined it for me. This will break everyone's hearts, but the 'dazzling' really looked more like 'sweating'. And when Edward jumps out the window with Bella, they take some leaps that look like really bad wire work, I think if they had more force pushing off it would be more believable. Um, 'Spider Monkey'? Horror horror. That was Rob's own invention I think, but it was a fail fail. And then they're in a tree, and she's all 'this doesn't happen! this isn't real!' but er, hello, he pulled exactly the same trick when he dragged you to the clearing to see him 'sparkle' and you didn't seem phased at all at that point. Did not make sense. Likewise, how did you know James was tracking you before they said anything about James being a tracker? Other than that... some of the dialogue was really expositional, there was a scene where they sit on a rock and he tells her about being a vamp... pretty dull stuff. This is pretty minor, but when Eric 'lost control' of his van, I thought it looked like he was out to get her on purpose. Just the editing there, I think. The other question was, in the prom scene, why was Bella wearing leggings? That's a fashion faux-pas if ever there was one. And even if it wasn't, how the eff did she put them on?! She's wearing a bloody cast!

OH flashbacks = BAD TIMES. Really dramatic shots in the Phantom Of The Opera sepia of Carlisle turning people and them making horrid faces. Hmm... seems like Carlie might be the weakest link here.

Lots of people made a really big deal about the Cullen house not being like in the book, but it really didn't bother me, I quite liked it.

But, you know, that was a pretty detailed thing of what was bad, just so you're prepared. Because really, if you are or ever were a fan girl, it's totally worth it. Just for the *sigh sigh* I wish someone would look at me that way and say 'you're my life now' and stuff...

Warning: Worst date movie ever. Boys, the only way you can benefit from this is if your girlfriend watches this and is feeling really mushy and you do something nice like hold her hand... but any sex you have will be purely the slow candle-lit type, so I wouldn't bother if I were you. Send her off with her friends and be prepared to hear about how inadequate you are.

Twilight Business

I'm still not ready to do my 'review', I'm thinking I might wait til I've seen it a second time. Which I will do, and soon. But in the meantime, I thought I would lend you my BCA expertise and talk numbers.

This weekend (opening weekend in the US :) ) Twilight grossed 70.6 million.

Since the average movie ticket is just under $7, that means that over 1 million people saw it. Apparently 75% of the audience was female (surprise?) and 45% were over 25 (actual surprise). That was a little Variety statistics for you.

More stats? It beat the shizz out of Bolt ($27 mil)(s0 suck it Miley...) and also SITC, which I guess is how the movie world defines a female film. It's the biggest opening for a female director, so well done Crazy Cat. Um... and it made just over $20k per theatre, but I don't know if that's per screen or like cineplexes included. It's playing in 3,419 runs, but balls if I know what that means. It's either screens or places, idk.

Anyway, it cost $37 mil to produce, and probably around $30 mil for P&A. That's Prints and Advertising to you, prints being the actual film reels that get sent around to the movie theatres. And the ads being those things that make you giddy with excitement when you hear 'You're impossibly fast..." during the ad break of GG and Grey's.

The studio gets like 50c for every $1 at Box Office, so Summit is now at $35 million. In three days. And one country. It hasn't even opened internationally yet. And you know the FFGs such as myself are planning on seeing it at least twice more in theaters before buying the DVD, probably several times over because their/our copies will be broken from rewinding and playing a few key moments over and over.

So yea, Mormon Moron, Twilight really tanked.

Um, also, I have a Twilight poster to give away, if anyone wants it. I'm feeling generous. It's not huge or anything, but it's hawt. :)

Interesting...

The text message that I received was not NB, as expected. It was the 2 week boyfriend, that Su insists does not count but that NB seems strangely jealous of. As I told him (must find a nickname...) last week, at the weekender, as we took some awk pics.

Hm. Tonight might be interesting. Maybe I will have some gossip for yas.

Rona has returned.

Emo memo

A combination of PMS, Great Expectations and no word from NB in almost 48 hours had me all moody this evening. As I do, once every couple of months, I decided it was time to go into Heartless Boy Magnet mode and break some hearts and not care about stupid boys and their stupid uncommunicative ways.

I LBD'd and smokey-eye'd myself, and made myself a strong appletini, then sat down to wait for Ronez to come home and HBM it up with me at ex-roomie's Victoria's Secret party. A little alc and deathcab later, and I'm pretty mellowed out, so I texted the NB, even though I vowed not to.

Alc is meant to bring out the real you, right? I guess I'm ok with the real me being incapable of being angry and heartless. That can't be bad.

On FFGs

After watching Twilight last night at midnight (which I will update you on shortly), the official FFG look is confirmed. For those of you who have never encountered an FFG, here's a little guide:

[You might think this is rude/extreme generalizing, and you're right, it is. But think of it like racism - if someone is being racist about their own race, that's okay right? And since I am clearly an FFG, no p, kiddo.]

1) Looks: The main thing about the FFG is that she is plain and unremarkable, which is why she has to live vicariously through Bella Cullen and Paramore and Hot Topic. This is why most FFGs have brown hair and brown eyes. Or at best, a dirty blonde. Alternatively, some kind of bright, dyed shade to mask the FFG bleh (see Osbourne, Kelly). The FFG is probably pretty pale, from living with minimal exercise and hiding in her room reading. For the same reasons, she can be sized anywhere from 0-100, but is never toned.

2) Fashion: This varies, depending on age and how rebellious she is feeling. Generally, she wears plain one-colour things, like jeans and a t-shirt. But since the FFG clearly craves attention, she lusts after Hot Topic punk, and might indulge in the occasional bow hair pin. The FFG may take outfit queues from books/music/tv that is a la mode, dressing as the main character does.

2a) OR if it is a really special occasion, such as a concert or the opening night of a FFG approved movie, she will don a 'band' shirt. By band, I also mean movies/books/whatever that the FFG is supporting. This band shirt is often slightly too small/ill fitting, clinging uncomfortably over the chesticles/love handles/arm fats/bra bulge. One mystery I have yet to solve: does the FFG like that all the other FFGs have the same shirt, or hate it? Is it like finding a kindred spirit or like going to prom and seeing some other slut in your dress?

3) Hobbies: There are a few types of FFGs, and hybrids. The music FFGs adore trolling iTunes for emo music and dreaming that the emo boy singing is in fact singing about her and how she broke his heart. The book FFGs enjoy reading young adult book series that star a (skinny) FFG and the devastatingly handsome boy who falls in love with her for no reason other than her sheer charm and wit. The movie/tv series ones do the same thing, except they watch them. All FFGs then proceed to log on to the internet and read/write fanfic and post comments on fan pages and try and get themselves prominent enough in the FFG world that they become minor celebrities. That is the ultimate goal. (See Meyer, Stephenie and Bella Cullen Project, The)

3a) Hobbies (no event available): The FFG likes anything to do with magic and fate, because you know that's the only way she'll snag her handsome handsome man who is sooo much better than the stupid boys who go to her high school and have crushes on the stupid cheerleaders. Anyway, this includes things like astrology, mythology, and fortune telling.

4) Ambition: I'm sure there are lots of noble FFG ambitions, but the real dream is to become an author and get to make an FFG movie about your own book where you can choose the dreamboat that falls in love with you... er, the heroine of the book. Next best is to be such a huge fan that you get to interview an FFG idol, go to a premiere/concert for free, or at least write such awesome fanfiction that you get a few FFGs of your own. Uh, the real dream being that the FFG idol spots you in the crowd and speaks to you, and you utter such a memorable line that he immediately whisks you off into his Hollywood life and you can write a novel about it and... it's a never ending cycle. At the very least, an FFG would like to rise above the FFGdom and be BFF to some FFDidols. God, that got complicated.

5) Habitat: The FFG can oft be found loitering around CD or bookstores, sometimes libraries. On weekends, they may be found in clusters. To find them en masse, check out the FFG events, as listed earlier (special occasion where one might where a band shirt).

6) Patron Saints: Bella Cullen, the chick from Paramore, Liz from Roswell, Cho Chang... it's an endless list.

7) Queen of the FFGs: Stephenie Meyer

Happy Hunting!

Hit List

Sorry I've been neglecting you. Here's a quick (pop)date:

1) Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, should watch Slumdog Millionaire.

It's a sweet little film shot in India about a boy who goes on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire to win the heart of his childhood sweetheart. That doesn't really do it justice. Best parts: Bright colours, amazing child actors, great soundtrack. The only down side is that the plot is a leeeetle cheezy. But we all like a little mush right? It would be a great date movie, but doesn't have to be. It's directed by Danny Boyle if that means anything to you, he also did Trainspotting and 28 Days later. Mostly, you should watch it because we should support great movies so that more get made.

2) Pushing Daisies is being cancelled? WHYYYY???

At least there's still GG. I live to watch Blair and Chuck.


3) James Bond - Quantum of Solace. Gotta throw my 2 cents in, right? Um... it was a pretty typical Bond movie, I think. Ya know, sex, chase scenes etc. It's a sequal, sort of, to Casino Royale. It was a little more intellectual than usual... Jamie had some mental issues he had to sort out, but other than that it wasn't really super special.

I was really torn up about Olga Kurylenko because on one hand I was pretty sure I thought she was adorable, but on the other, her hair looked kind of weird a lot of the time. SPOILER ALERT! The best thing, for me, was when you see girl #2s dead body, in the oil. Looked very cool and old-Bond.


4) I am kind of addicted to the Mentalist, this crime show where a fake psychic solves mysteries.

I've heard it's like Psyche, but not funny. Umm... I love the man, Simon Baker (Creep from Devil Wears Prada), because he's adorable, and Deb from Empire Records is in it and she's always really cool, plus it's really interesting to see how 'psychics' figure shit out and hypnotize people. But mostly I love that I can always guess who did it within the first 10 minutes. It makes me feel like a psychic too.


5) OMG in 14 hours I will be watching... TWILIGHT!

Yes, I am going for the first screening at the Arclight. I am such a FFG (Fat Fan Girl). But I did have enough pride to resist a) going for that MTV Spoilers thing, b) Loitering around Westwood last night for the premiere, which was an FFG infestation, and c) buying the poster. I was later rewarded for c by finding a large box of them at Norris after class.
Mormon Tool from my BCA class thinks that Twilight is going to tank. Clearly he knows not the power of the FFGs. I also want to say that he is going to be a shitty producer, but I guess he just won't make ALL good things. I can't say for sure that what he DOES make will be shitty. One thing I am sure of, he WILL make something, because his film biz fam seems to be rolling in cash and encouragement.