One dish two ways - for the Omnivegitarian couple

As a child, brussel sprouts were up there on the MOST HATED FOODS list along with innards, gizzards and chicken feet. Which is weird, because I was a pretty well behaved kid and generally liked most vegetables, with a particular fondness for cabbage. And sprouts are mini-cabbages.

Anyway, bizarrely, this winter seems to have been the rise of the brussel sprouts season, in both quantity and esteem. You've seen me roast them before, but when we were at NBs house for Christmas his mummy steamed some, and he loved those much more. One thing you should know about NB: he is of a household that doesn't particularly consume salt or... flavours. Ie oil and fried. He is also currently a vegetarian.

Here is the result: 2 dishes, zero extra work! And as a bonus, I will throw in a middle ground.

Steamed Brussel Sprouts

(You are probably noticing my thumb over the lens. Stellar photogs skills. It was too bright to see the screen!)

Ingredients: 1 bag of brussel sprouts, Water

Clean sprouts. This involves rinsing them, cutting off a little bit of the stem part and removing the outer leaves.

Bring one pot of water to boil (but not enough water to touch the bottom of the steamer part, because then it's boiling the vegetables), steam sprouts until they are tender and green. Easy peasy. I would say like 10 minutes? Watch out though, if you over steam those babies they will turn an unappetizing shade of gray-green.

Also, here's a tip for those who don't have a steamer: Use a metal sieve in a regular pot, cover.

Serve.

One step up: Lightly season and mix with a small pat of butter until melted.

For the fatty:

Pan Fried Brussel Sprouts With Bacon

Ingredients: Pre-steamed brussel sprouts, a teaspoon of minced garlic, 2 streaks of bacon

Ohh yea, you heard me. Bacon. So while the sprouts are a-steaming, fry up two streaks of bacon. You may want more, or less, depending on how fatty your bacon is. Mine was some budget Vons bacon, and did you know that price of bacon is inversely proportionate to amount of fat per streak? When the bacon is crisp, remove and set aside. Sautee the garlic in the fat, then add the steamed brussel sprouts (you could cut them in half - may I recommend length-ways? - first), season - but go really light on the salt, and pan fry until they are slightly browned. Serve with the bacon crushed over the top.

One step down:

Use a tablespoon of butter instead of bacon fat, thus making dish vegetarian and slightly less sinful.

So. There you go. Reclaim the sprouts!

The Red Pepper

TheBigBoss is away this week, so I finally have time to catch up on my reading / procrastinating. You are probably wondering how one can have to 'catch up' on procrastinating - trust me, it takes many years of experience to get to this level. Think of it like sleep debt... if I don't get my 8 hours in a day, I have to do 10 the next. Only not quite as many hours.

Anyway, let me share with you the incident of The Red Pepper.

Last weekend, NB and I took a little impromptu road trip southeast. I give only the direction because there is mostly nothing there, except eventually we got to the Salton Sea.

Day 1, Gas Stop 1, there was a fruit stand by the gas station . They have bags of 25 avocados for $5! 25! But the 25 are very small. They also have 10 large for $5. Still very cheap. We go for the 10, not thinking about how there is no way we could possibly finish 10 avocados in the time it takes for them to ripen, and especially not thinking about how being shut in a warm car does something chemically to speed up the ripening process. (Don't question me on that one, it's part of the 'food magic' that I can't explain along with ripening avocados with apples and bananas and leaving the seed in the guac to keep it from browning.)

Naturally, we arrive home the next day and they are perfect. The bestest, creamiest, smoothest, non-brown avocados we have ever eaten. True Californian Avocados.

By Monday we realize that eating 9 avocados in the 2-3 days following would probably not be possible. As it is a public holiday for some, NB, Dad and I have a dude day with a Star Wars marathon and doughnuts. We decide to make it an even Dudier day by making some guac. The NB is sent to the store to get the supplies.

He comes back with:

3 tomatoes

1 red pepper

1 block of tofu (for other purposes).

And says: I forgot the lime!

And I am like... and the cilantro. And everything else. And WHY did you buy a red pepper?

NB: You said! You said to buy a red pepper!

Me: I most certainly did not.

NB: You said pepper! You said red!

Me: *Confused* Maybe I meant black pepper? But we have black pepper... what else goes into guac?

NB: You also said mint but I didn't want to.

Me: Cilantro... tomato... onion! I SAID RED ONION! NOT RED PEPPER!

NB: Oh.

So the NB was sent back to Vons to pick up, ya know, ALL the ingredients except the tomato.

Maybe you had to be there. But that red pepper was the butt of many jokes for the rest of the week.

Esoteric Inklings

The words 'esoteric' and 'nefarious' have been floating around the office a lot this week. I know, whaaa? The only reason I even know the word esoteric is because of writing 340.

Anyway, esoteric seems to describe my ultimate Christmas wish. The other stuff is just cuckoo bananas items, business as usual. (Isn't the phrase cuckoo bananas just great? I picked it up from Degrassi a while ago and have only now resurrected it.) This Christmas List was done at the request of my darling Choops, but anyone else who wants to give me presents is welcome to. That's YOU, NB!

(Speaking of NB and presents, he did a wonderful job of getting me the microplane for our 2 year anniversary present. All the TV chefs have one, so of course, I believed that it was the only thing standing between me and great zest.)

The regular stuff first:

1. 2010 planner

I need a planner, because now that I am a grown up, I plan on 'doing drinks' and 'getting together' after 'checking my schedule' . And while the computer is all well and good, it is not as fun. I also associate it too closely with work.

Here are my requirements:

- Small-ish, and light. Must fit in my purse.

- Cute. Must not be embarrassed to take it out in public.

- Of good quality paper. Must be able to withstand personalization with highlighters and other office supplies.

- Must open to the spine (eg. spiral binding). I am left handed and if it doesn't open all the way it's realllly hard to write.

Inspiration: Here, and here, and here, and here. All are somewhat lacking.

(The picture is from Red Velvet Art - their stuff is sooo cute, especially the underpants. But no planners :( )

2. Feather skirt

I know, you are probably like errr... fashion faux pas. But I think they are so cute.

Requirements:

- A wearable colour. There is a hot pink one floating around the internet that I am not digging.

- A fun length. And by fun, I mean short. Not like teeny tiny, but you know, not matronly.

Concessions:

- This would also be acceptable in dress form, if the top of the dress is cute too.

(I am a medium, or size 12 uk, 6 us)

3. Rain boots

Granted, it rains maybe 3 days a year in LA. But boy, on those 3 days, I always wish I had Wish William's Wellingtons.

There was a pair from the Gap that I loooved a couple of years ago, navy with a pink trim. All gone now.

Requirements:

- Cute (duh)

- Not too colourful. I need to be able to wear this with whatever outfits, and probably my polkadot raincoat.

(I am a size 8 1/2 us... 39 eur... I think uk 7 1/2? I used to be 8 but my feet have been shrinking...)

Speaking of boots...

4. Motorcycle boots

So, my beloved brown Payless boots have a hole in the zip from four years of loving, a million spilt drinks and one winter of sledding (Yes, I went sledding in heels. The were wonderful ice picks). These Pradas would be an excellent replacement. (I also have my over the knee black Victoria's secret boots, but they are pretty whorish and not entirely work appropriate, and also, they make my feet feel a 19th C Chinese woman with bound feet... and a computer...)

Requirements:

- None, kind of. I mean, black or brown. Heel, or none. Knee-high or mid-calf. (Er, not ankle though. And mid-calf might look cankly, but I am open to your good taste).

5. Rolling pin

It's just one of those things that I really need but have never bought. I have been using a wine bottle (always available in my apartment) covered in clingfilm. It does the job, just not as well.

Other things that are always welcome:

Costume jewelry (or real, that's cool too), accessories (hats, scarves, gloves, over-the-knee socks, leggings, arm warmers, sunnies, umbrellas, weird hair things), clothing basics (cardigans, basic tees and tanks), kitchen things (fun cookie cutters, cook books, pie tins, weird shaped cake pans, holiday sprinkles, pretty jars for sugars and flours, cake stands).

Isn't this necklace sooo cute? From here!

And now, it's time for... the Ultimate Christmas Wish:

To be a Portland Housewife.

Let me explain. Portland housewives don't have to be from Portland, but they generally are, because that's where all the cool kids are from. They stay at home all day and bake and craft with their young children, then blog about it. They crochet and make cute stuffed animals out of felt and play dress up and have herb gardens. They shop at farmer's markets. They buy handmade. They go thrifting. They loiter around Etsy.

My first experience with the Portland Housewife was Amy Karol, and I believe she is actually a Portland Housewife. Then the Bluebird Vintage girl, who has a child and is crafty cool so qualifies, then the Red Velvet Girls and now I am just swamped with blogs to envy and projects to wish I was doing.

Anyway, seeing as I actually like my job (other than the whole waking up and having to work thing), and really only want to dabble in Portland Housewivery for now (although, in 5 years, I will be all over that shizz), I would like to craft more.

So what I need for that is: Patterns. A sewing machine. Books. Someone to teach me to knit. Someone to teach me to crochet. Cool wools. Cool fabrics. Needles. Buttons. Stamps. Inks. Funny-shaped hole punchers. Ribbons. Cute papers. A wicker basket to keep them all in.

Any contributions would be welcome.

Most Wonderful Time Of The Year!

Here is an update on my life through iPhone pictures:

My first peppermint mocha of the season. Nom nom nom.

Also, 99c Advent Calendars from Trader Joes! Whee!

(I don't know why it comes up sideways. It's fine on my computer. Stupid)

Here is my HouseElf, aka NB, leaving photos of himself on my phone.

Having a HouseElf is useful because they do things like:

Laundry/Making the bed

(Uh, yes, my room is a hot mess)

Putting up pictures on wall.

As you can see, my HouseElf is not trained in uncrookeding pictures, so he artfully decided to stagger them.

He also does dishes and bathrooms.

The End.

Embracing English Roots

In the last week, I watched 2 indie films (which I believe were pretty mainstream in the UK), and zero blockbusters. (I have absolutely no interest in seeing 2012, for some reason. Oh, probably because I think that John Cusak and Amanda Peet are the most irrelevant has beens to cast as romantic leads in any film after 2004. Don't get me wrong... I loved John Cusak... when I was 10).

The Boat That Rocked (Or, to American Audiences: Pirate Radio)

I have been anxiously awaiting this one since I saw the trailer when I took my 15 year old brother to see the Hangover as an attempt to buy his love back after not picking him up at the airport.

Anyhoo, what's not to love? The peeps from Love Actually (which I made NB watch in prep for both this and Christmas), with particular hearts to Bill Nighy. Jack Davenport, aka Steve from Coupling, who is showing up everywhere these days, most notably Flash Forward...

...And that hottie mc hot hot, Tom Sturridge, who you might remember from previous posts as being the hottie son from Being Julia, Robert Pattinson's bff (apparently he was sleeping on his couch in NY?) and also from briefly dating Camilla Belle. (Side note: on LaineyGossip, she had a hilarious posts about "why is?" and one of them was Camilla Belle which I thought was dead on). Except Holy Mutha I thought he had a monobrow when he first came on. But it's ok, it was just his greasyEnglishboy mop of hair.

Thoughts on Talulah Riley? I just can't decide on her. She was in St Trinians, which I loved, but I didn't love her. She was in Pride and Prejudice (the Kiera one) as the sister that no one remembers. She was in a little movie with RPattz (there's that cinema incest...) which I didn't see but she looked annoying in. She was the love interest in this. IDK. She's ok. She's pretty. I feel like she's one to look out for, if anyone is interested. Bet you she makes it big.

Oh. Right. The film.

The plot: A bunch of dudes operate an illegal rock and roll radio station from a boat in the English Channel and have to thwart the government peeps who try to shut them down.

I liked it, it was hilarious. The dialogue was super snappy, and it was really fun and campy. I had some issues with the story... it was just kind of like... whaa? The whole bad guys trying to shut down the radio thing felt like it was just thrown in to give some kind of structure to the happenings on board. Most of the attempts by the bad guys were shut down by a line from Bill Nighy ("Well, I hired this awesome DJ, so our sponsors will give u

s money from abroad since it's illegal in the UK..."). But whatever, who really cares about a little thing like emotional investment in the plot? I'm just rooting for the boy to get laid.

Although I did cry in the end. NB hinted that he might have gotten misty-eyed also. Here's a hint: they might have borrowed some shots from Titanic and The Perfect Storm. Yeaaaa.

~

An Education

LaineyGossip told me to watch this, and apparently I take whatever gossip blogs say to their millions of readers as personal messages à moi. Oh, also I saw the trailer on iTunes and it looked trés bien.

At first I was hesitant about Carey Mulligan, because I think she looks slightly lesbionic with her new haircut for Wall Street 2, but now that I've seen the film I'm thinking she is way too awesome for Shia. Not that I don't love him. But... I love her more.

Jenny, a swotty 16 year old trying to get into Oxford, decides that school isn't that awesome when you can just marry a rich, exciting older man.

I loved this movie because Jenny was so so so real. At the beginning of the film, I was like ugh, she is so much cooler than I was because she's clever and witty, and drops little bits of french into her speech, which I remember being the thing to do at that age but my accent was always dreadful. Hers is perfect.

Then she goes out with Peter Sarsgaard's friends, and meets Helen who is all sophisticated and chic and does her hair and wears jewels and in real life was a Bond girl one time... and Helen says she got her fur from King's road, and Jenny says something like "c'est trop cher pour moi." Very subtle, I like it. But Helen looks at her like she is a complete alien and goes "What did you say?" and Jenny says "I said it's too expensive for me." and Helen says "No you didn't." and Jenny says "I said it in French." And Helen says...

... Why?

And it is like whooosh you are a little embarrassed girl, and it's not like Helen is being rude, she is just genuinely perplexed. I was right thurr with Jenny.

Also later at dinner, Jenny gets all excited about the art and has a burst of enthusiasm and gives her very adult, flippant view on art, and they indulge her and make it so so clear that she is such a child playing grown up. And her man would tease her about being so bourgeois while doing ironically bourgeois things like drinking champagne at dinner and going to auctions.

Anyway, those were my two favorite moments. And also this white and red dress that she wears.

Also love: Olivia Williams as her teacher, and Emma Thompson as the head mistress. This was set in the 60s, by the way, which was interesting because the only thing women could do with a degree was go into public service or teach, and it was pretty normal to be insanely racist...

One thing I did not love: again, the plot was a little weak, or rather the overall lesson was. It was basically one big PSA to stay in school and not have sex. Um, that might clue you in on how it ends.

Hmm. It seems Emma Thompson shows up in both of these. Also bangs, which made me very analytical of my own. More to come on that topic. I also found myself sounding more English for a good half hour after... then I lost it again.

Candle in the Wind

Speaking of smelly things, I bought a scented candle from the cute little store across the street - Jonathan Wright and Company. That is not a very cute name for a store, am disappointed now that I have checked the receipt. But they had a cute little poodley dog running around that looked like a very small lamb with a bald patch on it's rump. And their website is cute. So I guess it's ok.

My tropical chutney or whatever from Bath and Bodyworks has been running down, and as I said, NB has very smelly farts, so I decided I needed to invest in a new candle. I only like citrussy ones, don't ask, just personal preference. This is 'Goji & Tarocco Orange' by Voluspa and it smelt quite delicious, but now that I have it lit I can barely smell it at all.

Still, at least it is brightening up my lonely office and keeping my mini pumpkin company. When is the appropriate time to throw away a mini pumpkin? Should I keep it through Thanksgiving? It doesn't seem to be rotting yet.

*Update -- two coworkers have said that my office smells rocking the stockings so I guess it's just my nose. *

Sprouts

Here is my champion weekend purchase from Trader Joes. I don't even like brussel sprouts but it was like $3 and who knew they came on a vine and were such freaks?

Roasted with EVOO, salt and pepper... for an hour... on 400F. A bit of a failey fail, the house was very hot and the outsides were a little black and the insides were a little raw and the stalk did not cook at all even after another 20 min sans sprouts. That was sad. In the end, we should have just plucked em off and roasted them so they would be cooked evenly. But that seems like such a waste.

Now everyone is farting sprout farts, which are similar to cabbage farts but stay in the air longer.

Oh, yes, that is NB in the background. He bicycled all the way to LA from Washington state. I know, what a crazy. Now he is all hairy and all his clothes have holes and his shoes are smelly and actually orthopedic shoes for elderly women. My receptionist is going to queer eye him this weekend.

Lucky

NB complains that I do not say good things about him, with particular regards to my journal. Which he read. Easy to confess once you leave, right?

Anyway, since it seems to be not adieu but ttfn, here is something nice.

Um, does anyone else think this is the worst music video ever? Awful editing, zero story, clearly just an excuse to go on holiday.

Dream Dream Dream

Last night I had a weird dream I thought I would share and interpret. I am just that bored.

So, I was very pregnant, and my water broke. I was put on this white couch to give birth and I was all freaking out that they only gave me one towel, and it's a white couch, and it was going to get dirty. No one seemed to care except me. Then I was actually giving birth. You will all be glad to know that it hurts only slightly more than a very constipated poop. Easy birth, gooey baby. But then I got worried about my placenta being broken, because in Bio in secondary school our teacher told us about how if its not complete then the pieces left behind can rot in your uterus and make you sick. But I guess it was fine, and the baby was fine. Then the baby and I went with cousin Alex, Aunty Cyn and Uncle John to some super secret safety deposit box thing where I wasn't allowed to go in. I don't remember that part very well. But we were in a lift.

So, here are some interpretations:

To dream of reclining on a couch, indicates that false hopes will be entertained. You should be alert to every change of your affairs, for only in this way will your hopes be realized.

To dream of giving birth can represent the beginning of a new project or stage of life.

A baby signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. A love may be blooming for you in your near future. You will also make fun new friends. Babies may also symbolize something pure in your own inner nature. If you dream of a crying baby, part of yourself may feel deprived of attention and affection.

To see a placenta in your dream, symbolizes dependency and reliance on other people. It also suggests that there is something in your life that is no longer needed. You need to let go of some of the unnecessary burden.

Riding in an elevator means that you are looking for help with a specific problem, or you want to achieve your goals in a hurry without putting much effort into it. Riding up in the elevator means social and professional advancement.

To see a bank in your dream denotes your desires for financial security.

SO. Let's interpret.

Because I have recently graduated from college, a new stage in my life is beginning. Also because NB is moving home. I am slightly in denial about the fact that I will probably never see him again in my life. That's a kind of hard thing to accept. NB is probably the placenta, and the false hope couch. That bastard.

And yes, I would like to become a producer with not much effort, that would be sweet, or even just to have an assistant job. So there's my elevator. And really, who doesn't want financial security?

What the family members have to do with it I do not know. Perhaps I want to use family connections to get ahead with little effort and have money? Sounds about right.

What have you guys been dreaming of lately? Anything this weird?

Some Summer Dos and Don'ts

DO: Watch Star Trek.

Okay, okay, it wasn't the best thing I've ever seen. It was the best Star Trek I've ever seen, but I was always biased against Star Trek because I thought you had to be exclusively dating either Wars or Trek and I had chosen Wars. Now I know better. Whatever, it's worth a look for guys and girls. But not for my Mum, she'd hate it.

a) It's hilarious. How could it not be, with Simon Pegg in it? Also, Harold aka John Cho. Guess he has to start acting in real things now that Kumar has run off to the White House. Even without Simon Pegg, it was much more funny and with it than I had expected.

b) Half the shots I swear were homages to other greats like Star Wars (on Hoth) and Transformers (in the desert, when that monster comes out).

c) Sylar was Sylaring around the place. This is neither here nor there but worth mention.

d) Some great cameos: Winona Ryder. Tyler Perry. Enough said.

e) Eye candy. You know, Chris Pine? AKA Princess Diaries 2, and Just My Luck guy? How can you not love that face? Adorable.

Don't: Read the Manny.

It's really dull. Like the Nanny Diaries, but from the POV of the Mom who thinks she isn't the same as the rest of the Upper East Side, so even duller. There's a handsome man in it and a few funny sidekicks but mostly she bitches about how stressful it is to work part time and have three children and three staff, how her husband is a shallow tool, how her Manny is hot... Spends entirely too long on the subplot about her job as a news producer. Really, no one cares.

Here's the sums: Boo hoo, I work so hard and my kids feel neglected, especially my son who effed up in his basketball game and is pretending not ot care. My husband is a lawyer making lots of money but is all bummed that he isn't making enough for a private jet, and thus has no time for our son. I will hire a handsome man to hang out with my son. I totz have a crush on him but I'm too good a wife to do anything about it. Bitch friend went down on him in the closet at a playdate! I hate my husband, also, maybe I should leave him, but sometimes I like him. Oh also boo hoo work sucks I have such a good story coming out that it has been such hard work. Gay men like to give me advice on how to be less frumpy but I don't seem to understand. I love being frumpy. But it's ok, my manny loves me, I figured it out when I went to his birthday party and this really cute girl who had a crush on him told me he was head over heels with 'someone' and someone else told me he had made big bucks off this software he was developing but didn't quit because he didn't want to... ditch my kid? He loves me and now he's really rich. But I have work and fam, so sorry manny. I just caught my husband eating my other friend's vag. OMG. I should get a divorce and hook up with my manny, but not immediately. I don't understand why my manny is so upset I don't want to hook up with him, upset enough to run to California?? Actually I'm just going to take the kids away for a weekend. Manny came to visit! We had hot hot sex, but not that hot. Husband came to visit too! I blackmailed him because he has been doing some dodgy things with his law firm and is in trouble, and now I am free. Manny says I need some time alone, so he will meet me in our spot in central park in precisely 6 months. He did.

(That was the actual last line of the book... 'and he did.' Or something Similar.)

The worst thing about this was that it referenced Britney Spears' Manny and thus means it wasn't even a fresh new idea. It means that it was already old news.

The best thing was that the main chick was advised by a friend to 'always blow your husband'. Hahaha. Every morning apparently. Rona and I discussed it and decided it was a gross but genius plan. From Rona's POV: He'd never cheat, unless he got horny at lunch. From NB's POV: How could he say no to anything? You just gave him a BJ. From my POV: His friends would mock him if he ever complained about anything, because the rest of them only have sex once a month.


Don't: Read Lucky



For some reason, we've been getting a subscription to Lucky for free. The just keep showing up. And they kind of suck. For instance, the May issue assured me that crimping hair was back in. That is a damn lie. Less offensive, but still not great in a fashion mag: Everything is kind of old news. Gladiator sandals, hobo bags... is that stuff still in? Weren't they soo last summer??

Most importantly: No horoscopes. Whaaaa?

Cinnamon Palmiers

I was feeling fancy one afternoon, plus I had a leftover sheet of puff pastry in the freezer, so I decided that palmiers were the way to go. Esp since they are so easy peasy. And called elephant ears, so cute! I've made savory ones before, (honey mustard and prosciutto) but they were kind of fail fail. Anyhoo, inspired by the recipe on joythebaker, and all these pics I've been seeing lately of cinnamon buns, I made these.

Brought them to class, great success. Except NB was like 'why are they burn't?' and I was like 'they aren't fool, that's the cinnamon and sugar'. ANYWAY. I did get 'these are really good, where did you buy them?' That's pretty legit right?

Makes around 24 small pastries.

1 sheet of puff pastry
1/4 cup white sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon

You'll probably have extra sugar.

Roll out the puff pastry sheet, using some of the white sugar instead of flour to stop it sticking. Mix the rest of the sugars and cinnamon together, and sprinkle generously onto the sheet. Roll the pastry in tightly from both sides. Wrap in cling film and fridge for half an hour.

Pre-heat oven to 400F. Line a cookie sheet with wax paper.

Take roll out and cut into 1/4 inch slices, place on tray. I sprinkled some extra sugar on top of each one. Bake for 10 minutes. Let cool on the sheet.

Done!

Looking through old pictures...

Am reminded that while their faces are very different, NB and the first BF (Maggothead, I am leaning towards...) are very close, physically. Which suits me just fine, especially since NB is slightly taller so I can wear heels and still be shorter.

Funny picture, because Maggothead (understand that this is not an insult so much as a reference to a time that maggots crawled on his head... Su and Sam will remember this...) was in the army and had sand in his ears and his lip was all banged up and his shoulder all scarred. And was wearing my pink aviators. It was our first real date, I guess, to Swensons at PS. When we were all hush hush secret secret. Heh. Oh, memories.

It's nice to be able to look at a photo and still be in love with the moment, even if not with the person.

Runners up:

At prom, where MH is looking more like gay stylist than potential boyfriend.

In boxers, my sunhat and white sunglasses. Cannot seem to find picture taken on same day where a bra replaces sunhat in some kind of bizarre Mickey Mouse parody.

In changing room at Tangs, trying on an incredibly tight pair of skinny jeans (him, not me).

Strangely, have two pictures featuring... 'Pen pen', as he affectionately named himself. Fear not, Nick, your number will always be higher. Also one of Sean Marc. (Sorry, lah, he does not need a code.) And a really great one of Dom being a nerd. And of course, tons with Su, Adelle and Sam.

Aw.

Fist Weekly Family Dinner - Vegan Paella

Everyday at the co-op, 2 people are in charge of making vegan dinz for the whole house. When I first heard that, I was green with envy, looking at all these fun vegan recipes on tastespotting and stuff. Then I remembered: I have my own house of people to feed.

Thus began the new (actually, renewed) tradition of Sunday night dinners. This week, we had

Veggie (for Rach, which in this case is also Vegan) Paella.

You might remember I was a little obsessed with making the perfect paella after my Spanish Summer. I haven't revisited it in a while, but this time was by far the best.

Ingredients:

(feeds 4-6, depending on how fat you are)

1 brown onion, diced
3 tomatoes, diced and deseeded
3 cloves of garlic, minced
1 red/yellow/orange bell pepper
6 stalks of asparagus, sliced
1 cup of peas (I used frozen)
1 cup of artichoke hearts
2 1/2 cups of medium grain rice
1 cup of white wine
5 cups of vegetable stock
2 tbsps of olive oil
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp saffron, crushed
salt & pepper, to season

Heat olive oil on med heat (I added a pinch of chili flakes for an extra kick). Sautee onions and garlic until the onions are transluscent, then add the tomatoes, and sautee together. Add paprika, and seasoning. Add bell peppers, more sauteeing. Add rice, artichokes, asparagus and peas, and stir them all together so the rice is evenly coated, then add wine, stir until it cooks off a bit. Season again. Add vegetable stock, then cover and leave to simmer for about 20 minutes. Uncover and simmer for another 10 minutes so that the stock boils down.


Try a spoon of rice from the side to make sure it's cooked. If it is and the stock hasn't evaporated enough, try scraping the sides in to let the liquid run through the rice a bit more. Turn up the heat for the last minute to slightly burn the bottom of the rice. (Like bibimbop, the burnt rice is considered a delicacy. I failed at this part because I walked away to watch the end of the superbowl and the bottom ended up very black. But the rest of it was good!)

Wait... No butter?

The NB has moved into the co-op, which is a large orgy full of hippies and pot and some cats under one roof. They do cute community-type things like have a roster for who cooks dinner for everyone one each night. There are 16 of them, so this is no small task. And, three (or more?) of them are vegan, so all the dinz have to be vegan. You know, like even more than just vegetarian, like zero animal products? No eggs (bye quiche), no milk or cheese (bye lasagna, grilled cheese, everything good in this life) and no butter (um... goodbye Paula Deen's entire stock of recipes.) So it pretty much goes without saying that there's no bacon.

No bacon???

Anyway, because I love to win the hearts of new people with baked goods, and because I wanted to play with the KitchenAid, I ventured to make vegan chocolate cupcakes.

Love of my life...

Here's the recipe. If anyone is ever feeling vegany.

Vinegar in a cupcake?? Let curdle?? BLEARGH!

Here they are before being iced. I didn't take a picture of the after-icing, because first I delivered most of them to the very greatful hippies who happened to be inflicted with the munchies when we arrived, and the few that I left behind were attacked by ants before I could take a picture.

Speaking of icing, I don't think her recipe is quite right. Hers makes 12, so I doubled everything, but the buttercream was WAY to thick. It wouldn't go through my piping tips ( :( no trial run there...) even after I had soy-milked it down, resulting in me spreading the icing rather than piping. Then I checked the KitchenAid cookbook which gave a similar recipe only it was 4 cups of icing sugar (instead of 5) and zero cocoa (which one might need to make it chocolate...) so that kind of explains why it was so thick. So yea, if you do make these, take that into consideration.

Melissa came down halfway through the baking and said that it smelt like bacon, which is ironic, n'est pas? But other than that, both Dad and NB said that they were delish. The hippies also, but they were high so I don't imagine that they were very picky at that point.

The Pageant Results Are In!

In case anyone was dying to know the outcome of last night... it was D) none of the above.

I was all planning on not saying anything, but then I also hate to go to bed somewhat angry. So I shared with NB, gently broaching the topic with 'maybe I shouldn't go tomorrow, I feel like I'm intruding on your boys' night out' and ending with 'it's not MY fault you dropped her, she wasn't even here when we hooked up! She should hate you, not me!'

NB concludes that while BWB is the only one of his friends who cares, mayhaps I should not go. This is obvs not the answer I was digging for, but whatevs.

I have decided to go for my zen approach. Not care. I'm an Aries, quick to anger but also quick to get over it.

The facts are these:
-NB doesn't have feelings for her, and never had enough feelings for her to actually date her.
-I would never want him to tell me that I couldn't hang out with a guy friend, even if we had had a history at some point.
-I would like to be friends with his friends, but she is very much an integral part of their group.
-We don't even know if this biz is going to last past graduation.

Conclusion:
I have better things to waste my mind on, like Bridezillas on WE. And really, if I'm not bff with his bffs, I won't die. So, whatever, girl. Keep playing that great Avril song in your head (Girlfriend, duh.), it ain't happening.

To The Mattresses!

To 'go to the mattresses' is the Godfather way of saying go to war. Not that I watched the Godfather. But You've Got Mail is on TV fairly often, and Tom Hanks references it a bunch of times.

Why, you ask? Why would a lovely, sweet, peaceful girl like me go to the mattresses?

Here's the story:

I'm in this class that is a really massive and also one of the most desirable electives in USC. As such, everyone and their dog is enrolled in it. (Except Rach). This includes many hot faves such as Facebook Foul (aka 2 week boyfriend, aka 'go stand over there'), GhettoFabButActuallyRichAndAsianGirls, WooStalker, BW and many many more. (Not BabyFace though, oddly). Natch, that means that Mom, Dad, Rona, NB and I all get to take a happy family class.

But you know who else is in it? The previously unmentioned BitterWannaBeExSomethingButAtLeastThey'reStillGoodFriends of NB. Boy that's long. We'll shorten it to BWB, because that's the important part.

(And why am I so sour, you ask? Those who know me know that I am generally quite rational and not unreasonably jealous. But this BWB HATES MY GUTS. Like for serious. Case in point: "She can't come to my party, NB, she's not on the guest list. But you're still coming right?" Which made me SO mad because really, what kind of girl doesn't know that as the Still Good Friend you are meant to play the fake nice card?)

ANYWAY.

I left for the bathroom before the movie started (oh, I gave it away...) as did many other girls. I saw BWB and a friend of hers coming down her aisle and they were walking right next to me, but I pretended not to see her. Then, she and her friend are standing behind me in line for the bathroom and I hear:

BWB: Oh shit don't turn around, I don't wanna say hi to her.

*mumble mumble*

(I'm thinking... she can't be talking about me, but that's fine, I'll just pretend I don't hear...)

BWBF: Oh, but its NEIGHBOURBOY! You should go say hi!

BWB: Haa... whatever, I already saw him yesterday, I don't need to *mutter mutter*

BWBF: But it's NEIGHBOUR! You should introduce me!

(In my head: OMG bitch, do you think I can't hear that you're talking about my boyfriend while you're standing behind me?)

BWB: Whatever, I'm used to not having him around...He used to be around all the time, but now *mutter mutter* So I was with NB's ex roommate right, and we were planning this thing with like dinner, movie, comedy club, and we called up (name) (name) and (name) and NB *mutter mutter*

(Note: NB and I were attending this event, and I am fairly good friends with NB's ex roommate seeing as he was also a NB if not THE NB.)

BWB: *Mutter mutter* and NBER and I were like 'since when have we hung out with her', *more muttering about how I should not have been invited*

So what do you think guys? I am totally in the right at hating this BWB, right?? Because, you know, I was RIGHT THERE. And she wasn't talking quietly. Which makes me think that she wanted me to hear.

Here were my options, in order of appearance in my mind:

1) I'm going to sulk back to my seat, and tell NB that his horrible BWB is bitching about me in the bathroom and say that I don't want to go because obviously she has something against me.

2) I'm not going to say anything to him and just say I don't want to go/act busy tomorrow.

3) (The apparent winner) TO THE MATTRESSES! Don't say anything to NB and show up for this shindig and be amazing and sparkly while she is short and somewhat frumpy.

3a) Tell NB after the event, so that he can take appropriate action.

First BabyFace Sighting of the New Year

Walking into the Ralph's parking lot (carpark!), NB's arm snugly around me. Was taken quite by surprise as did not get the spidersense.

Small wave.

He was alone, unless you count a large cart of food. No wonder he is getting round.

Ha, BabyFace, ha.

Boys Say The Darndest Things

This was a text I got last week (from NB):

"I have an advent calendar but instead of days before xmas its days before amanda and instead of chocolates i just masterbate"

Rekha thought it was the funniest thing she had ever read, and nearly choked on her coffee. Rona was pretty grossed out, as was mom, but kind of bemused. Rach thought it was really romantic.

Thoughts?

Baby It's Cold Outside

Here is what is making me happy at this moment:

1) I finally got my Advent Calendar off Ex-Arty-Neighbour, and it is more glorious than you can imagine. Little windows with chocolates somewhat resembling the Lindt Truffle Ball Things, and a 3-D tree! Plus, because it was the 7th, I got to crack open 7 little windows and share :) I know, I'm so nice.

2) We did our Secret Turkey exchange. Yes, you heard right. The roomies and I have a little tradition going on where before Thanksgiving we do a secret-santa like thing with a $10 maximum, then we switch gifts after. Mel had me, and she bought me some large underwear. It is a running joke with us that I wear a lot of giant underwear. Which really, I do. Sexay.

3) The Ex-Neighbours had their annual x-mas party, and I got a French for Children book from the white elephant. I love it, because even though I took French for more than 10 years, I am still at child level.

4) I got to talk to NB on webcam for a fairly long time, and laugh at his horrible hair and tufty facial fuzz.

5) The Irvine non-relations sent along a bag of 22 romance novels that Rona and I are working our way though.

Here are some things I am not happy about:

1) I have a final due tomorrow morning that I am only starting on now. There is a long story behind this, where everyone in my class thinks our teacher is an idiot, especially after he announced over Thanksgiving that he changed his mind about not having a final, please make ourselves available on the last day of finals to do a group presentation. Horrendous uproar from class ensues, because half of these people have already booked tickets home for before that, ecstatic to have no final. He settles on an email final, which is grammatically incorrect.

2) There is never enough sleep.

Here are some things that I am neither way about, but that I am sure you will find interesting:

1) The 2-week boyfriend, here on known as Facebook Foul (much like Party Foul, so named for his question upon being broken up with: what will we put on facebook?), drunk texted me on Sat with what suspiciously looked like a booty call. Luckily, I was too enthralled with my romance novel to be even slightly tempted..

2) The Spanish Summer Senor Facebook chatted me about how he wants to get married and have babies, but is lacking the woman and job. This will probs surprise a lot of you, but that's just how he is. He likes to be affectionate.

Of Former Romantic Interests

I saw BabyFace today. Or rather, he saw me, and I said 'hi' back, totally unphased. At Crocker, as usual. No spidey senses tingling, which is strange. Perhaps I am over it. Or perhaps I was stressed.

Also saw the GoldenBoy in class. No props for anticipating that one, because he is also in the class. He is looking golden as always, though somewhat scruffy, but I think I like the scruff. I am balls awk in that class, I never talk to him even though we are technically friends and I spend a great deal of time staring at his sockless shoes (and also handsome face).

Mormonmoron said some moronic things, as usual. Then he tried to schmooze with the guest speaker. But at least he dresses quite nicely.

Don't worry kids, all is well with the NB. Although he did get stung by a jellyfish. And no, he didn't pee on himself. He poured vinegar on the sting. I know, lame. I was a most unsympathetic GF, gaffawing away as he told me how scared he was that it was some kind of treacherous poisonous one that could kill.

Why do Jellyfish look like spacemen?

33 more days.